Welcome to today's issue of the Nerdy Buffalo
Send any questions or responses to me at
nerdybuffalo@charter.net
buffalo
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buffalo Says
Nothing new broke today so how about a joke
Instructions for Microsoft's TV dinner
You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to
accept and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not
give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would constitute an
infringement of Microsoft's rights). You may, however, let others
smell and look at your dinner and are encouraged to tell them how
good it is.
If you have a PC microwave oven, insert the dinner into the oven.
Set the oven using these keystrokes:
\mstv.dinn.//08.5min@@50%heat//
Then enter:
ms//start.cook_dindin/yummy\|/yum~yum:-)gohot#cookme.
If you have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start. The oven
will set itself and cook the dinner.
If you have a Unix oven, insert the dinner, enter the ingredients of
the dinner (found on the package label), the weight of the dinner,
and the desired level of cooking and press start. The oven will
calculate the time and heat and cook the dinner exactly to your
specification.
Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners may crash, in which case your
oven must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove the
dinner from the oven and enter:
ms.no.good/tryagain\again/again.crap.
This process may have to be repeated. Try unplugging the microwave
and then doing a cold reboot. If this doesn't work, contact your
hardware vendor.
Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger
than the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of
which are empty. These are for future menu items.
If the tray is too large to fit in your oven you will need to
upgrade your equipment. Dinners are only available from registered
outlets, and only the chicken variety is currently produced. If you
want another variety, call MicrosoftHelp and they will explain that
you really don't want another variety. Microsoft Chicken is all you
really need.
Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue all smaller versions of
their chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the larger
family size. Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must
be saved only in Microsoft approved packaging.
Microsoft promises a dessert with every dinner after '98. However,
that version has yet to be released. Users have permission to get
thrilled in advance.
Microsoft dinners may be incompatible with other dinners in the
freezer, causing your freezer to self-defrost. This is a feature,
not a bug. Your freezer probably should have been defrosted anyway.
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Reader's Respond
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Hey Buff,
Thought you'd get a kick out of reading and seeing this
piece from Snopes regarding Bonnie's submission!
Atb,
B.J. in Philly
http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/pcsnake.asp
buffalo says Once again they have managed to make a whole page that
says actually nothing. It might have been a fake snake or the snake
might
have been posed but we have no evidence. In other words they don't
care
if they are right or wrong they just want you to go to their site
because their advertisers pay by the page view. The pop-ups and
google ads are
notorious for malware and if you read web of trust there has been
browser
exploits from that site.
~~~~~~~~~~
I am sitting here with tears flowing down my cheeks after reading
your message, Buff! Such a wonderful young life to be so cruelly
affected by the cruelest disease known to man!! You continue to be
in my prayers, Nancy! Keep the faith and we'll keep the prayers
wafting heavenward!
Much Love....Ginger Adams
~~~~~~~~~~~
So many thanks to you, Buffalo, for keeping us informed on Nancy`s
health. People out here really do appreciate your time and effort.
Nancy, so much love surrounds you. I wish for you nothing but peace
and happiness,wherever you may be, wherever you may go. It is all
love. That is all there is. And love never ends.
Michelle.
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Bytes & PC's
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Mouse in Her Bra
http://www.buffaloschips.com/acdhhdd.htm
Movie
http://www.buffaloschips.com/abghyy.htm
Movie 1
http://www.buffaloschips.com/acccd.htm
High Fireman
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdfdd.htm
Milt Show
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dffrf.htm
Lucky 2
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gsdhdjd.htm
Lucky 3
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ghsjs.htm
Lucky 4
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshslkssjs.htm
Magic 1320
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gdhdjd.htm
Magic Food
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gdhdjssaa.htm
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Next Up on Deck
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Tomorrow's questions that will be answered... If you recognize the
problem in any of following questions send me your response for
tomorrow's issue... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
### If you do not see your question in this section please look up
top to see if it has been answered there###
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including all the specifics about your computer and its problem i.e.
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